JOCKEY JOURNAL: CLAUDE VONSTROKE

As willing to command a room the size of your grandma's lounge as he is danceland's most prestigious big rooms, Dirtybird boss Barclay Crenshaw, known to clubbers as Claude VonStroke, is a walking clubs survey — we should probably ask him to list his Top 100 Clubs...

Instead though, we've roped him in to write a DJ diary. From Bristol's In:Motion to a tiny bar in Brisbane to a bizarre DJ set away with the “Candyland” fairies, this is one Detroit-born Dirtybird with an incredibly busy flight schedule. Following riotous BBQs in London and Miami, San Fran's finest bassline bringers have secured a Thursday night residency at Sankeys Ibiza this summer (launching 27th June), so we figured you'd want to hear from the big man behind it all...

“Who knew a tiny little room on a Sunday night in a town that isn't known for dance music at all would be one of my favourite gigs this year? Certainly not me. I vaguely remember the last time I was there also being good, but this room was heaving, including people dressed as horses, badgers, chickens, etc. They knew everything I played, even shit that wasn't out yet they knew. It was like a room of geeked-out super fans, with the entire front three rows almost all ladies, who really set the tone of the room, grinding it out booty style on the dancefloor. Can't beat it.”

Sky Bar, Brisbane

“It's funny all these little tiny rooms end up being my favourites. I'm in Australia and I'm making a stop over on the way to Perth for a little day party. I'm playing a bar with the doors open and there are gale force winds outside. In most cities, no one would have left their house, but this place was absolutely jumping off. Lovely people who really made the effort to party. That storm was no joke either, it turned into a massive cyclone, causing terrible flooding and roofs ripping off houses. So I was never able to get to Perth.”

“Probably the best line-up I've ever seen, including everyone from Paul Woolford to Joy Orbison. We had the main room for Dirtybird, and even I was surprised how crazy it got. Some girl was flashing Kill Frenzy her titties in the front row while Justin Martin and Eats Everything seared that room like a tuna. They rocked it so hard it took me 20 minutes just to figure out what to play after them. Catz 'N Dogz were smiling. I was drunk and stupid. Good times. And Bristol, hey, it's like the sister city to San Francisco.”

“Yes, the 'rave' cruise to the Bahamas is real and Dirtybird was invited this year. Besides the fact that my wife got sick the entire time and some of the music was a bit much, I really enjoyed hanging out with my friends and playing music. The fans are rabid and genuine, the weather is fantastic and the boat is actually really nice, no cheap cruise line here. I recommend everyone do it at least once. You are guaranteed to get to speak to any DJ you want, because you are there with them for days. Best day is when they take over a whole island to do a massive beach rave.”

“The venue might not have been as underground as I like it when I go back to play in Detroit, but try telling that to the people who raged on that night harder than almost any crowd. They gave me the Detroit flag to wear around my chest while I played, and they screamed and cheered from the first track till the very end. Best part is that I also got to see all my friends from growing up and have dinner with my parents, who still live around there. There's nothing quite like going to the place you grew up and having them show you some love.”

Unicorn Club, Candyland

“Lots of gigs are special, but what happens when a leprechaun pops out of the air and invites you to play music for dragons and centaurs, witches and wizards? The decks were made of chocolate and the mixer was invisible. I had a hard time getting the goblins going, they are such haters, but all the lovely pixies and wood elves were really getting into it. I even saw a dragon doing a little head nod way in the back. Lovely place, maybe they will have me back sometime.”